Not too fast. That’s what I have told myself from the beginning. As if I am on a local train, and only go one stop at a time. Once there, I walk around a bit. Do I like it here? Do I want to go further, or do I want to go in a different … Continue reading Looking forward

It's not easy for a woman, choosing the right clothes. Compared to men, their options are a hundredfold. Stress to choose. Do I go for a dress, pants, or a skirt? A long, short or midi skirt? Wide or narrow? With print or plain? Which blouse goes with that skirt? Which cardigan goes with this … Continue reading Finding my style

I confess. I'm still a little jealous. Jealous of all those women who go out and walk around the city wearing beautiful dresses. They look so good. Everything is fine. What they do is normal. And they have not much to fear. For me this is still a serious hurdle. When I go outside in … Continue reading My superhero costume

About nine months ago, I finally accepted it. I too sit under the colorful umbrella of the transgender community, a lovely community. Being trans* still occupies me a lot, but in a much more positive way than before. Since that moment I had my first total makeover done, bought some nice clothes, took make-up classes. … Continue reading Little changes

Dear L, It happened. I did it. I went out. For the first time. And now, of course, you're wondering what it was like, but you already know that. I want to be honest with you, L, it wasn't easy. I enjoyed it, but not to the fullest, not every second. There was also fear … Continue reading My first time out

14 years. I’m quite certain that I was 14 when I first discovered the pleasure of a skirt. What I don't remember is how it started, or why I did it, but at one point I took the skirt out of my sister's closet, and my heart started beating faster. Because I knew what I … Continue reading My first skirt

Dear Louise, How are you doing? I don't have to ask. Because I already know. I also know that this letter is no surprise to you. You read it already when I wrote it. You told me you're looking forward to next week. That' s when you go out for the first time, and I … Continue reading A special letter

Last weekend. We sat at the table, at dinner. The boys, my dearest, and I. The daughter was still in the dormitory. At a certain point, we were talking about everyone's special qualities, including the negative ones. We were allowed to give our opinion unvarnished (our family's trademark: lack of varnish). It was my turn. … Continue reading She said it.

Once upon a time, at a time that never happened. And somewhere, in a place that doesn't exist. Alem and Biruk go into a shop, for the first time ever. They're very excited. After all, this is a fantastic shop. Because they have the tastiest biscuits there. Soft biscuits, and hard biscuits. Or soft biscuits … Continue reading A parable

There are role models. I choose examples. Amal Alamuddin. Audrey Hepburn. Emma Watson. After all, I want to do it right. In style. I want to avoid making a caricature of a woman. No, my appearance should be a tribute to femininity. I know. That's ambitious. I watch instructional videos of fashion models on youtube. … Continue reading Studying women